When Aruna Irani ‘married a married man’ Kuku Kohli: ‘Wives always blame the other woman’

Kuku Kohli

Filmmaker Kuku Kohli, whose recent passing at the age of 77 marked the end of a significant career in Bollywood, was known for directing a range of action and comedy films. His directorial debut, "Phool Aur Kaante" (1991), was particularly notable for launching the career of actor Ajay Devgn, establishing Kohli as a director with an eye for talent. Beyond this, he helmed other successful projects such as "Kohraam" (1991), "Suhaag" (1994), and "Haqeeqat" (1995), often collaborating with prominent actors of his era. His professional life was deeply intertwined with his personal relationships, especially his long-standing partnership with veteran actor Aruna Irani, who featured in many of his films and even produced his 2002 romantic action thriller, "Yeh Dil Aashiqanaa."

Kohli's personal life was marked by complexity, as he was already married to Rita Kohli and had two daughters when he met Aruna Irani during the filming of "Kohraam." This pre-existing marital status necessitated a decision to keep his subsequent marriage to Irani private for many years, a choice that shaped their relationship significantly. The article highlights how Kohli's relationships, both within his family and his professional sphere, were central to his life story, reflecting the often-intricate personal narratives behind public figures in the entertainment industry. His passing has brought these aspects of his life into renewed public discussion, offering a retrospective on his contributions and personal journey.

Aruna Irani

Veteran actor Aruna Irani has offered a candid and insightful account of her unconventional marriage to filmmaker Kuku Kohli, a relationship that began amidst professional tension. Irani initially harbored strong negative feelings towards Kohli, recalling that she "used to hate Kuku ji" due to his demanding work style and perceived inconsideration on set. However, this initial animosity gradually transformed into friendship and then love, leading to their decision to marry despite Kohli's existing marriage to Rita Kohli. This choice led Irani to maintain their union as a secret for a considerable period, primarily driven by a desire to avoid causing pain or disruption to Kohli's first family, as she confessed in an interview with ANI.

Irani's perspective on being the "other woman" is particularly noteworthy, as she directly challenged societal norms that often place sole blame on the woman entering an existing marriage. She articulated a powerful argument, stating, "Wives always blame the other woman," and emphasized that the primary responsibility for a marriage's state lies with the husband. This stance reflects a nuanced understanding of marital dynamics, moving beyond simplistic moral judgments. Furthermore, Irani made the profound and difficult decision not to have children with Kohli, a choice influenced by her own experience as a child of a second marriage. She expressed a desire to spare any potential child from the emotional complexities and pain she herself had experienced, a sentiment she shared in an interview with Lehren Retro. Her decision to speak openly about her marriage only after Rita Kohli's death in 2022 underscores the deep consideration she held for all parties involved.

Rita Kohli

Rita Kohli was the first wife of filmmaker Kuku Kohli and the mother of his two daughters, Pooja and Karishma Kohli. Her marriage to Kuku Kohli predated his relationship with Aruna Irani, and her presence in his life was a central factor in the decision by Aruna and Kuku to keep their own marriage a secret for many years. Aruna Irani explicitly acknowledged that Rita was aware of her relationship with Kuku, and that Rita's discomfort played a significant role in the prolonged secrecy surrounding their union. This situation highlights the profound emotional complexities and sensitivities inherent in such relationships, particularly the impact on the existing family unit and the desire to mitigate distress.

The article reveals that Aruna Irani only began to discuss her marriage to Kuku Kohli publicly after Rita Kohli's passing in 2022. This timeline is crucial, as it suggests a deep respect and consideration for Rita's feelings, indicating a conscious effort to avoid causing further pain or public scrutiny while she was alive. Aruna's defense of her actions, while acknowledging the difficult circumstances, also implicitly addresses the often-unseen emotional toll on all parties involved in complex marital situations. The narrative surrounding Rita Kohli, though not directly from her perspective, underscores the broader societal issue where the "other woman" frequently bears the brunt of blame, rather than a more holistic examination of the dynamics within the primary marriage and the choices made by all individuals involved.